Bill Alexander and Hannibal the Cannibal
[page 79, line 16]
JUDGE VANCE: We’re ready to get started if you will please. I’ll ask Randy Taylor to come up. Break a leg.
MR. TAYLOR: I don’t know if Judge Vance asked me to come up because half the people were still out of the room or not. I reckon that’s probably why. Judge Vance, Judge Eillis, I’ll be brief in my remarks. I knew that would be the best laugh I would get this evening.
I see my friend Charlie Tessmer down there. Charlie, back during the time frame after he lost his first wife and before he married Norma, Charlie stole my girlfriends. I mean, that’s a true story. He really stole some girlfriends from me. But Charlie and I have always been friends.
I tell you, folks, there are two lawyers — I’m not talking about judges. I’ve got some judges I greatly admire, but there are two trial lawyers that I really greatly admire. Charles Tessmer and Bill Alexander. They’re light and dark difference, but they’re two tremendous trial lawyers.
I’ll tell you a brief Bill Alexander story and then I’ll move on to this other story I’ve got for you.
There was a guy that would — what was that guy that played Hannibal, the cannibal? It was in a Jodie Foster film. There was a guy in the penitentiary that would have made Hannibal, the cannibal, look like a punk. And Judge James Zimmerman told me this story. This is a legend. And I believe it to be true because I think that for a while Hannibal, the cannibal, was out of the — escaped out of wherever he was at and he was tracking Judge Jim Zimmerman. And Judge Zimmerman, for several days in the Allen courthouse over here, had two Texas Rangers walking down the hall with him all the time. I mean, this guy was bad news. Well, Zimmerman told me this story.
Hannibal, the cannibal, had a list — I mean like a death list when he was in the county jail over here. And Bill Alexander had prosecuted Hannibal, the cannibal. So Bill Alexander found out that Hannibal, the cannibal, had him — he was like one of the eight people on the list that he was going to go kill. So Bill Alexander went up to see Hannibal, the cannibal, in county jail, and he explained it to him something like this. He said, “Look, you son of a bitch” — Bill being the subtle person that he is, he said, “Look, you son of a bitch” — he said, “If I see you on the street, I don’t care what you’re doing, I’m going to kill you. I carry a .45 all the time, and I’m going to absolutely just waste you right there. It don’t make no difference what you’re doing, if you’re just walking down the street with groceries in your hand.” So Hannibal, the cannibal, picked up his list and scratched Bill Alexander off his list. That was the end of Hannibal, the cannibal, wanting to kill Bill Alexander.